Family Help Techniques for Effective Child Communication

How do you get your child to talk to you?

How can parents create situations where an exchange can take place without pressuring your child?

To start parents need to make use of their parenting skills and adopt a sensitive and attentive conversational style in order to facilitate the communication. What strategies and parenting techniques can be used in the family? There are two types of interventions; the self-talk and parallel-talk. These two techniques are great parenting tools to help your child with exchanges and communication.

The Self Talk or Monologue

The self-talk consists of describing your own gestures and thoughts vocally. In this method, the adult in the family(parent) is demonstrating his availability and interest in communicating by a smile look and position yourself at child’s level. This type of technique works best when the parent integrates himself with child’s play. For instance, while your child is playing with blocks sit next to your child and start building a small house with the blocks. After a moment, start commenting verbally, for yourself, what you are currently doing. “My house is coming along. I’ve placed already two rows of blocks…” Be sure to pause between words and sentences so that your child will take interest in what you are doing and saying. Meanwhile keep observing the reactions of your child discreetly. Notice how your child may cast a glance to what your have built. It is at this point, that an exchange is about to begin. Remain calm and continue to proceed by saying, “Hum…I’m missing a red block. I don’t know how I’ll find one.” Be patient and wait. See how your child will find and hand you a red block. In this situation you can benefit by simply thanking your child. If the child is timid or reticent they are often ill at ease in front of an adult’s reaction even if the aim is to congratulate.

The Parallel-Talk or Description of Child’s Actions

The parallel-talk consists of describing without judgment the actions of the child. For instance, “I see you’ve made a track for your cars. You’ve used yellow and red blocks.” The goal here is certainly not to approve or disapprove what the child did or attempt to influence. It is simply to inform the child you are available and interested in what he is doing. The goal of these interventions is to create favorable situations conducive to exchanges without obligating the child to respond. When the pressure disappears you will be surprised and witness your child finding pleasure in having a conversation. Your child will be willing to begin this sort of exchange more often now.

Go ahead and experiment these techniques and strategies with your child. You will notice that the conversation will take an unexpected turn and that your child will open up and communicate with you more freely. The benefits are rewarding parents and children can really get to enjoy interactions and family fun more easily.